I got the rash.

18 09 2009

About a week ago I upped my dose of Lamictal, and got the rash.  It was a spindly red map, like that of those pictures of rivers and lakes taken from space.  It covered my upper left leg.  I was immediately taken off the meds.  Now I’m in between with little to no meds.  I’m spiraling again.  I was feeling so good, and keeping a great perspective, hence the lack of posts.  Everything was smooth for a few weeks and I had hope that I had found stability.  I’m here to say, that isn’t the case unfortunately.  More trial and error in store.

I’m currently not getting along with my husband, I feel uninspired, and I feel agitated.  I’m sick of medicines that don’t work or those that poison me.  I am, in the midst of it all, trying to keep my head as level as I can.  I can’t go on any new meds for a few weeks because of the Lamictal allergy.  I’m trying to use visualizations to keep my mind focused.  We’ll see how those work.  They appear to be working a little bit, as I’ve not totally dropped off the edge.  I visualize myself being healthy and healed.  Anything is worth a try at this point.  Especially anything that isn’t a chemical.

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